Thursday, July 3, 2014

In a fit of frenzy if your spouse says she has left you for someone else, and asks you to take care of the kids too! Would you kill your kids and kill yourself?

This is exactly what happened. The attempted suicide did not work, and the father has confessed to killing his children.  

I have personally known of instances where the wife went to the Middle East never to be heard from again. The father has had to bring up the kids by himself with great difficulty and with much ostracism from the village too!

Sri Lankans are NOT equipped to deal with the social problems caused by sending their especially women folk to the Middle East for jobs. The remittance from the mother is the MAIN source of income for the family, that is why she went there!

From a simple unsophisticated background, having to confront another world, where many are lonely, it is easy to fall prey to other associations with the opposite sex, willing or unwillingly. The men folk who send their wives MUST understand the possibility can become a reality and unless they are mentally equipped to cope with that they must be careful when the collective decision is made for the mother to leave in the best interests of the family.

As a society Sri Lankan men are extremely psychologically immature, more than women, and I blame this mainly on society and the mothers of these men. They do not explain the facts of life as they should know it. Men are generally led to believe certain sureties about their wives that turn out to be untrue!

The children in the above case were both under 7. I believe there is a rule to prevent mothers leaving if the kids are under 18 and as I understand this mother only left a year ago, after the rule was adopted.

Who permitted the woman to leave, and what incorrect statements did she give to the authorities before she left? We as a society MUST take some collective responsibility in this tragedy rather than just blame it on the father and be done with it. He is likely to spend a long part of his life, if not life in jail, as he is not one with the wherewithal to find a good lawyer to fight his case, as manslaughter with diminished state of mind.

Let us take steps to reduce the likelihood of such tragedies occurring in future.      


Anonymous said...

sri lankan society is morally bankrupt, where basic human values are suppressed; the war-time years wer bad, with people killed, blown to smitherines, and vaporized on a regular basis and the decay of basic values seems to be getting even worse in this peacetime "boom." this is a difficult problem to fix as it takes generations.

Ratmale,Minneriya,Sri Lanka said...

I accept your premise, but I believe it is our duty as responsible citizens to fight the morally bankrupt system, and the Govt. and show the people that there is hope for a better future.

That is called citizenship, something this Govt. does not want to understand at all.

Anonymous said...

citizenship is not a government issue, it's a citizen issue, and sri lankans don't have it anymore. the entire culture must be restored through inculcation of values which lead to action, and this takes a long time and work by everyone!! don't delude yourself to think that if the government changes that the society will be any different

Anonymous said...

culpability of the Foreign Employment Bureau should be looked into. Who prosecutes them?

Indirectly when the Govt. indiscriminately encourages people to go overseas, so that it both helps them with filling the foreign reserves as well as reduce the pressure on local employment, they too are culpable.

When a Govt has completely failed in their obligation to its citizens in means of survival, and pretends they are the reason for the growth, it is very hurtful.

Anonymous said...

I bet the mother of children will not attend their funeral. What is her culpability in this?

There is a huge moral tale here. Is there a Jathaka Story illustrating this point, to give us a perspective on where blame is apportioned?

These are the issues the Bana kiyana hamuduruwo must address as a matter of priority. Not pointing the finger at other religions.

Ratmale,Minneriya,Sri Lanka said...

The above two comments are related in that raise a serious structural flaw in our society and value system.

There is NO need to look outside our shores for the solution, it is simply home grown, and it is called a moral crusade against state sponsored social disintegration.

Leaders set and live by example which others follow. So look at who is directly responsible for this example. Let us just take the only action that can sort this out once and for all. Have the courage of your convictions.

This is just one point in a litany of woes that must be addressed if we are to grow out of this mess.

Anonymous said...

it starts with parents, not the president. the parents values are self-serving and this flows into the children. compound that with what they experience when they are with their peers, who are also influenced by horrible parents (if they have parents with them), and it flows into the culture of the country. it's a mess. and the government isn't to blame -- it's the money grubbing, self-serving Sri Lankans themselves, and no government will be able to change that. it's a social movement that must lead the way which requires citizenship-- which doesn't exist anymore !!! even citizenship has become politicized which is part of the problem where everyone views everyone else's motives through a political lens, and politicians hijack any social movement for political purposes. even you yourself seem to try to spin everything in a political angle rather than being a good analyst. is a new government going to change that???